I think to get fired for blogging about my job, I'd have to be more important

Or reveal some sort of deep, dart secret about the textbook industry. You know, like how we use child labor to bind our books. How Hill, formerly the other half of McGraw-Hill is buried in the catacombs at 1 Penn Plaza. Or, how we cut down rainforests to make paper. Wait, that last one might be true, I don't actually know.

Anyway, I think I'm safe.

GOOD GOD I HATE MY JOB!

Thanks internet, I feel much better.

It's like crack, only legal

Dear Person Who Invented Coffee,

I love you. I want to bear your children which is saying a lot since I've never said that to anyone. Ever.

Also, I'd like to know what possessed you to roast those little brown beans, grind them up, put them in hot water, and then drink them. Did you wait around wondering if you had just poisoned yourself?

If you could get back to me ASAP, that would be great, especially on the whole "bearing your children" thing. I'd really like to get moving on that. Thanks.

Stephanie